Traditions... Now while that word might have a nice ring to it and starting something with lasting memories that the whole family can enjoy---- the whole family doesn't REALLY enjoy it. It's mostly for that one person who says, "Gotta keep up with tradition!!"
With that being said, let's talk about one tradition we had growing up, which was the "Stand in line for endless hours to take pictures with Santa" tradition. From the first Christmas I ever had my mother had me sit on Saint Nick's lap for a picture with the jolly fat man. Seems simple enough-- BUT--We stopped this madness when I was 30...............30!!!! And it wasn't just me, it was me AND my brother who is 5 years older then me...... And started balding when he was 17.
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| We were so cute then! What the flip happened to us? |
Anyways, the pictures would go as follows... There would be one of me, one of my brother, then one of the both of us. The older we got the more "elated" we became cuddling up with a stranger who had a fake beard, was sweating from the immense heat the suit gave off and smelled a little like tears of fear aaand possibly urine... Standing in line with tons of screaming children for hours is JUST how I was hoping to spend my mall time during the holiday season once I was old enough to learn the value of shopping until I couldn't carry any more.
There is one year that sticks out in my mind above all the rest. I was 17 and sitting down for my annual picture. My brother was waiting for me to take my picture and my mother was discussing the details of exactly what she wanted with the elves at the desk. This particular year Santa was EXTRA "special"...
As usual.. I had gone up to greet Santa first. While everyone was preparing for the shot of a lifetime, the usual question rolled off his tongue...
"Have you been naughty or nice this year little girl?"
Now, before I could say a word, Santa slipped his arm around me, hugged up creepily close and whispered,
"You know, when you get older, sometimes it is better to be naughty then nice."
................................Wait................ What???
Did Santa really just say that to me?! I was completely shocked by the ballsy statement Santa so proudly whispered in my ear.. Then SNAP the picture was done. His hand on his jingle bells and all....
Oh my! You can totally see the shock in my face as I realize that the man who is supposed to be as wholesome as Jesus, all of a sudden became the guy who was probably out back, on his break, puffing on a pipe filled with his drug of choice and swigging off the flask of liquor before he gets back to the young girls. I can't help but think of the movie Bad Santa and wonder if he would have been cast as the lead.
Sooooo.... Yeaaaah.... It was definitely an experience that I quite frequently giggle about and I wouldn't be here telling this story today had someone not suggested we carry on with a tradition that probably went on a teeny bit too long. None the less, we have passed this tradition down to my children. And we will continue to do it until they are old enough to say they don't want to do it anymore-- then we'll find something new to start.
BUT you can gaur-on-TEE, as long as we continue it, I will be right there, by their side... Letting Santa know that he better watch out because Mama will find out if he has been naughty or nice and I will not hesitate to TAKE HIM DOWN if he is a creeper in any fashion with my babies!!! Not on my watch sir!!!! Not. On. My. Watch.
Finally-- I jut want to say--
HAPPY HOLIDAY, MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HANUKA, ENJOY WHATEVER IT IS YOU CELEBRATE (OR DON'T CELEBRATE.. I DON'T CARE-- IT'S YOUR LIFE TO LIVE AS YOU PLEASE) AND HAVE A FABULOUS NEW YEAR!!!!!!
P.S... I was going to put my final picture with Santa here... But it looks like someone puked on Santa's bear over last few years, so I'll just leave well enough alone.
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| Creepy Santa with his leg all up in my space and me not sure how to handle it. |
"Have you been naughty or nice this year little girl?"
Now, before I could say a word, Santa slipped his arm around me, hugged up creepily close and whispered,
"You know, when you get older, sometimes it is better to be naughty then nice."
................................Wait................ What???
Did Santa really just say that to me?! I was completely shocked by the ballsy statement Santa so proudly whispered in my ear.. Then SNAP the picture was done. His hand on his jingle bells and all....
Oh my! You can totally see the shock in my face as I realize that the man who is supposed to be as wholesome as Jesus, all of a sudden became the guy who was probably out back, on his break, puffing on a pipe filled with his drug of choice and swigging off the flask of liquor before he gets back to the young girls. I can't help but think of the movie Bad Santa and wonder if he would have been cast as the lead.
Sooooo.... Yeaaaah.... It was definitely an experience that I quite frequently giggle about and I wouldn't be here telling this story today had someone not suggested we carry on with a tradition that probably went on a teeny bit too long. None the less, we have passed this tradition down to my children. And we will continue to do it until they are old enough to say they don't want to do it anymore-- then we'll find something new to start.
BUT you can gaur-on-TEE, as long as we continue it, I will be right there, by their side... Letting Santa know that he better watch out because Mama will find out if he has been naughty or nice and I will not hesitate to TAKE HIM DOWN if he is a creeper in any fashion with my babies!!! Not on my watch sir!!!! Not. On. My. Watch.
Finally-- I jut want to say--
HAPPY HOLIDAY, MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HANUKA, ENJOY WHATEVER IT IS YOU CELEBRATE (OR DON'T CELEBRATE.. I DON'T CARE-- IT'S YOUR LIFE TO LIVE AS YOU PLEASE) AND HAVE A FABULOUS NEW YEAR!!!!!!
P.S... I was going to put my final picture with Santa here... But it looks like someone puked on Santa's bear over last few years, so I'll just leave well enough alone.
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