Master of Deception-- Fooler of One

It is no secret that I have been working my tail off since November.. I mean actually working it right off... And up too because it has LIFTED!  I've lost quite a few dress sizes. I am feeling great about it but in looking back at pictures of me last year, I realized that I spent a lot of time fooling myself into believing that my body was in much better shape then it really was. Take example A here...

Hot Mama, right?!

While I was proud of myself for getting a bikini and having the confidence to wear it, I am STILL super proud of me for doing it AND blasting it on the internet....  This was one of about 15 pictures in this particular "Photo Shoot" that I made a dear friend of mine endure.  I would look at them and say, "OH HELL NO!!!  NEXT!!!" until we found this particular position I was in-- I didn't freaking MOVE!  I made her take like 6 of them so we could pick the best out of all of them so no one could see what I REALLY looked like.... Which brings us to exhibit B.... One of the ones that no other eyes were meant to see at the time....

Hey.. Where did all those rolls come from?

This is what I really looked like-- when I didn't make sure I was at a perfect angel.  In the previous picture I had the arm held just right, sucked in as much as I could, raised the hip, tilted the head just right and put an extra distraction by having my tattoo bling it up in there.  I did a live, on the spot, version of Photoshop that had a few issues that came along with it.

I was content.  But I was content with being out of shape and out of touch with reality about how to reach my goals. The ONLY person I was really fooling was myself.  I even found myself fibbing a little about how much weight I had actually lost.  I knew I was at 18 pounds but I pushed it a little and said I was at 25..If I remember correctly-- I told another person it was "closer to 30".. :/ Just a wee bit of a push. I am no liar and I believe I was lying only to try and fool myself. I was pulling the wool over my own eyes and the clarity was lacking. I don't even think the 18 pounds I had lost were even still gone.  And it was a tough pill to swallow when someone said, "Really? Hmm.. Maybe it is just hard to tell in that shirt."  I knew right then and there that I was found out and it was time for my favorite next step-- CHANGE.

Because my vision had been a little foggy, there were some bumps in the road that I did not see coming even though, in reality, I was right in the thick of them.   But as I have found out with anything I do in my life, I used those bumps to bounce right back and get myself back in the game. I just had to take a minute to realize what was happening in order to clear my head and carve out the path I really wanted to be on. I mean I obviously didn't get rid of the other pictures because I knew one day I could use them to help me stay on track and remind myself of where I didn't want to go again. It took a little time but I did some reevaluating and began to nip a few things in the bud.

So, what exactly was I doing and what did I change?

First, I was not eating healthy anymore.  I figured since I was "losing weight" that I was, somehow, staying on the right track.  If I convince myself that the weight is coming off even though I wasn't doing anything to get me there then it was going to come off, right?  WRONG-- I packed on more pounds. I realized there was late night snacking, overeating, fast food choices and even when I had good choices in front of me-- I leaned towards the one that was not best for me.

So, as a result of this thought process, I began to have the classic love/hate relationship with food that I grew up with most of my life.  I would eat and eat and eat, then feel very guilty about what I was eating.  So guilty that I would do a sort of starve then binge thing.  I wouldn't eat all day. Then, when I would eat,  I would shovel in everything in sight at night, feel guilty, rinse and repeat  I even told a friend that I was beginning to feel guilty every time I ate and he was concerned about the idea that I might have an eating disorder and just might be better off speaking to a professional who could help me with the psychological side. I, of course, immediately denied it and quite frankly was a little pissed about the "diagnosis" he had given me. Hello??!!  Me?! Have problems?! I don't think so....... But I did... Not one that required a specialist but one that definitely required me to reevaluate.

Next, I realized I had began to avoid all cameras until the bikini incident came about. If I had to be in one, I was strategically placed so that you could only see me from boobs up.  I mean one good thing about being overweight for me means the girls are bigger then most human heads, so I was simply working with what I had.  I was GREAT at hiding behind people so that I didn't have to have my body completely visible. OR if I took them myself, then I would take 100 pictures until the right one came about and I no longer looked like I was obese and miserable.  If I turned my body just right, you couldn't see my back rolls or if I tiled my head just right, you could no longer see my quadruple chin.  It was all about the right angle for the wrong intentions-- to deceive myself and the world that I was on the right track just as I was doing with the pics you see here. 

Do to all the lying to myself, my love/hate relationship with food and hiding from cameras-- I began to get frustrated and upset that I was not only NOT seeing progress but that I was taking steps back.  I began to --again-- lose faith in myself that I would even be able to complete my journey but most of all that I thought I was no longer able to inspire and motivate people because I couldn't even do it for myself.  I felt like a fraud and wasn't able to even figure out what to do next. The truth is though, people were still being inspired by what I was doing, I just had to remind myself that it was ok not to be perfect.  I could STILL do this!

But really-- all these being said-- I also took the positive away from it.  I mean, I can get down-- but I don't stay down long anymore.  I have made a choice that I want to be happy and I once I realize I'm not, it sets me back on track pretty quickly. Once I pulled my head out of my ass, I used these thoughts to fuel my next moves.

I began to dig deep into the idea of educating myself about food.  Like I said in my last blog, I began to search for a mentor (and I found a few!!)  I began to not worry about what the camera said because it was me and I REALLY love me even though I forgot it for a while.  I even made the conscious decision to keep pictures that I would have normally deleted, smashed and/or burned in the past, so that says a LOT.  I knew, deep down, that these pictures would be the fuel I needed to rekindle my fire.  And this girl is on FIRE now!!  I pulled out the old pic after I had, carelessly, snapped a new one showing my stomach the other day... And the results blew myself away!! Wow!!

They were both me-- both the true me.  But now I am a much happier me.  Why? No more hiding.... No more fear... No more guilt... No more lies.  Only pure and simple, true results that I work hard for and I am proud of every day. But don't let me lie to you and say I've done this all on my lonesome.  I have a great support group, awesome mentors, an amazing accountability partner and I do have to give a shout out to Google for all the things I've been able to educate myself with over this time.  Having the right tools for me include people, because without them I would be all on my own and wondering how I am ever going to make it in this world.  It even includes my blog readers and those who follow me on Facebook.  I can't even begin to tell you how many encouraging messages I get from people that say things to the nature of, "I am watching you do this and I now know I can do it too."  THAT right there-- is a huge motivator in itself for me.  So I want to thank you ALL for joining in my journey with me.  Just a little less of me than before and getting closer to my goal each day!                                5/?/13                                                                      4/9/14

Ten Weeks of Life Changing AWESOMENESS!!!

Ten weeks of HARD work giving results!!

I have tried 100 times to get myself in shape and 99 times I've given up...... Every time I gave up I started to think this "healthy living" thing wasn't in the cards for me.  I just wasn't cut out to be a size 6, I'm big boned, my genetics were holding me back, I broke my leg, I broke my arm, I got sick, I can't run because my boobs are too big and I don't want a black eye.  You name it, I made an excuse for it not working out and, well, quit working out.  But now I look back and realize, those 99 times were there to show me what I truly wanted and to weed out what I didn't.  It was never easy to give up because it put me in a place, mentally, that I never wanted to return.  Yet, I would return-- willingly-- because I did not like what I was doing, how I was doing it or just didn't fully believe it was in the cards for me.

Working it in Body class

What has changed you ask?  Well, by a series of awesomely fortunate events, I crossed paths with the owner of a studio that I now consider my second home.  Not sure how we became Facebook friends but we were. She commented on my thoughts of becoming vegan (which I haven't done to the full extent yet but I'm learning) and that was that.  It was a life changing event that has brought a support group of women and a few men, who dare, that are happy, healthy, funny, working each day to do better for themselves into my life and I am SO grateful to have the opportunity to join them.

There is no miracle pill or single exercise that will make you healthy. I think we all know that by now. It is pure determination and hard work.  It takes time, patience, growth, some pain (and by some I mean a lot but never more then I can handle), support and a true willingness to give it my all if I really want something to happen in my life. 

Balancing in Mind class

So, my new friend invited me to take a class at her studio, Define Body & Mind.  My first class was on November 5th and I was completely hooked!  There was giggling going on in place of groans when the workout became super intense.  There was encouragement to "Smile through the shake." There was a room full of smiling faces. We weren't packed in like sardines in a sea of faces like classes at the gym.  The instructor knows everyone's names and frequently gives you that boost of confidence you need by telling you what an awesome job you're doing over the mic. They come through and correct your stance so that make sure you maximize each moment of your class. I knew almost immediately that I was home.  

There are 3 classes I take there that range from a full Body, barre, use your own body as resistance and light weights type of class, a Revolution class (REV for short AKA Spin) and the Mind class where you stretch and work out all of the lactic acid your muscles have in them after working so hard in your other classes by rolling over a hard silver ball called a Yamina ball.

REV class

Now the REV class, quite frankly, scared the crap out of me AND I completely avoided it for the first month.  I would just peek into the room like some sort of nosy neighbor ask, "Uhh.. Hey...Hey guys..What... whatcha doin' over there neighbor?"  And for the record-- if you want to join a place like this I would totally suggest NOT getting on the bike as your first class.  Those who have taken it know the seats are small and your, ahem, "whoody who" feels like someone beat the crap out of it with a sock full of rocks.  BUT the good thing is, that doesn't last.  You will soon get used to it and your nether regions no longer feel like they require an ice bath after every class. None the less, I chose to get up on that bike and ride like we were in the Tour de France and ready to bring home a million dollars for our team.  Because we are ALL in that ride together.  We push hard together, cheer for one another and there is an awesome added effect with dimming of the electric candles so you can really dig down deep as things get tougher to help you stay laser focused.

Never a dull moment with the best
instructors on the PLANET!

Within the first 2 weeks of joining and bringing on some of my close friends, they started a 6 week challenge.  The challenge was to take 36 classes in that 6 weeks.  I was not only determined to make it, I was determined to CRUSH the challenge and crush it I did.  I ended the 6 weeks with 53 classes and on the final day, I took 5 classes.  Two bodies, two Revs and a Mind.  I'm not even gonna lie to ya... I felt like a freakin' CHAMPION that day!!  And just for the record-- I won the challenge and earned myself a free month!  Really though-- I won far more then that.  I gained confidence, knowledge, experience, friendship and lost about 18 pounds and quite a few inches.  So rewarding!

After my first intermediate class!

As you can see, I love the place and even though I gave up 99 out of 100 times, this time I've got the mental strength I need to reach my goal.  This time I feel the love, support and guidance that I've always wanted to get on the right track and for that I am eternally grateful!  Even though I'm not even half way there, physically, I'm all the way there mentally.  This time I am not giving up.  I've got too much going for me and too many people supporting me to not make it.  But most of all-- I believe I can do it.  THAT is more then half the battle and turns a dream into a reality.

Feeling and looking good!!

Notice how my right
shoulder was slanted down
and now I am aligned!

Some Traditions Need An Expiration Date......

Traditions... Now while that word might have a nice ring to it and starting something with lasting memories that the whole family can enjoy---- the whole family doesn't REALLY enjoy it.  It's mostly for that one person who says, "Gotta keep up with tradition!!"  

We were so cute then!
What the flip happened to us?

With that being said, let's talk about one tradition we had growing up, which was the "Stand in line for endless hours to take pictures with Santa" tradition.  From the first Christmas I ever had my mother had me sit on Saint Nick's lap for a picture with the jolly fat man. Seems simple enough-- BUT--We stopped this madness when I was 30...............30!!!! And it wasn't just me, it was me AND my brother who is 5 years older then me...... And started balding when he was 17.

Anyways, the pictures would go as follows... There would be one of me, one of my brother, then one of the both of us. The older we got the more "elated" we became cuddling up with a stranger who had a fake beard, was sweating from the immense heat the suit gave off and smelled a little like tears of fear aaand possibly urine... Standing in line with tons of screaming children for hours is JUST how I was hoping to spend my mall time during the holiday season once I was old enough to learn the value of shopping until I couldn't carry any more. 

There is one year that sticks out in my mind above all the rest.  I was 17 and sitting down for my annual picture.   My brother was waiting for me to take my picture and my mother was discussing the details of exactly what she wanted with the elves at the desk. This particular year Santa was EXTRA "special"...

Creepy Santa with his leg all up in my space
and me not sure how to handle it.

As usual.. I had gone up to greet Santa first. While everyone was preparing for the shot of a lifetime, the usual question rolled off his tongue...

"Have you been naughty or nice this year little girl?"

Now, before I could say a word, Santa slipped his arm around me, hugged up creepily close and whispered,

"You know, when you get older, sometimes it is better to be naughty then nice."

................................Wait................ What???

Did Santa really just say that to me?!  I was completely shocked by the ballsy statement Santa so proudly whispered in my ear.. Then SNAP the picture was done. His hand on his jingle bells and all....

Oh my! You can totally see the shock in my face as I realize that the man who is supposed to be as wholesome as Jesus, all of a sudden became the guy who was probably out back, on his break, puffing on a pipe filled with his drug of choice and swigging off the flask of liquor before he gets back to the young girls. I can't help but think of the movie Bad Santa and wonder if he would have been cast as the lead.

Sooooo.... Yeaaaah.... It was definitely an experience that I quite frequently giggle about and I wouldn't be here telling this story today had someone not suggested we carry on with a tradition that probably went on a teeny bit too long. None the less, we have passed this tradition down to my children.  And we will continue to do it until they are old enough to say they don't want to do it anymore-- then we'll find something new to start.

BUT you can gaur-on-TEE, as long as we continue it, I will be right there, by their side... Letting Santa know that he better watch out because Mama will find out if he has been naughty or nice and I will not hesitate to TAKE HIM DOWN if he is a creeper in any fashion with my babies!!! Not on my watch sir!!!! Not. On. My. Watch.


Finally-- I jut want to say--
HAPPY HOLIDAY, MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HANUKA, ENJOY WHATEVER IT IS YOU CELEBRATE (OR DON'T CELEBRATE.. I DON'T CARE-- IT'S YOUR LIFE TO LIVE AS YOU PLEASE) AND HAVE A FABULOUS NEW YEAR!!!!!!

P.S... I was going to put my final picture with Santa here... But it looks like someone puked on Santa's bear over last few years, so I'll just leave well enough alone.

Shots (and not the fun kind), Shiny Stuff and Almost Losing My Shizzle: A Story of Survival as a Single Mom

Once you become a single mother.. Life takes on a bit of a different twist.  Things you used to do as a couple, you know have to figure out how to do on your own.  Now, this can go one of two ways for you.  You can either step up and take responsibility for you, your kids' lives, and some sort of manageable relationship with the father (provided he's not a psycho killer and in prison for life or some shit like that).... Or, you can let everything and everyone else take the blame for your current situation and crumble into pieces when the slightest wind blows against you.

With neighbor and friend's kids over often, 
my house looked like this...
Only I wasn't crazy enough to get pregnant again.

Now.. With that being said, I have-- at some point-- chosen both roads.  Considering I was already on the road that allowed me to place blame everywhere but in my own hands while I was married, it took quite a while of being single to change that.  I didn't take care of things that should have been taken care of and looked for reasons to blame someone else (mostly baby daddy) for the reason I had to handle a certain situation.  My house was a mess, my finances were out of control, and my kids were not what you would have called angels at that time.

I was trying to think the other day of the first situation as a single parent that I really got knocked back a bit, and this one memory came rushing up like bad shellfish....  The good thing now though is that every time I tell this story, it makes me laugh until my belly aches.  None of us are what we were then and there's no other way to look at your past than with a smile, right?

So, this particular instance happens to be the day I had to take my daughter, who would be heading off to Pre-K soon, to get her shots updated.  Brianna was 4 and I... well... I was way behind on doctor's visits for shots.  No biggie, we'll just get her all caught up and we're good to GO! Well, let me tell you.... If you are low income, such as I was, and you need a way to get free shots for your kids.  Be prepared to wait in lines that you can only compare to Justin Bieber manning a kissing booth at a tween convention.  It is a freakin' mad house and there is a line literally wrapped around the school parking lot--- twice.

I'm tellin' you this line was SO long that they had clowns and people walking around giving out bottles of water and snacks.  The water was greatly appreciated but the clowns and the popping balloon animals that left the little ones screaming, we could have done without. Also--mind you, this is Texas and it was mid-July.  It was hotter than HELL outside. We were melting out there and patience between a mother and a child ran very thin!!!

To top it off with my new found singledom.... Brianna and I did not venture this alone.. no sir!  We had 2 year old Ethan in tow.  Now-- boys, they like to move.  And let me tell you what-- that boy has never been still a day in his life.  Luckily this has him crashing out the second his head hits the pillow but as a newly single mom with no patience, no proper guidance and no plan-- this can drive you completely mad until you finally get a grip on things.

So, this is just the start of the insanity. We were in this line for about 4 hours when we finally got to a table. FOUR hours.... The first table we sat at, I produced my pitiful excuse of a shot record to the lady.....

Now, B, as we like to call her, is an amazing child. She will really think about the benefits of the things you are giving to her if you explain it to her in a way that she knows this is good for her.  She was prepared!  "Mom!  I can take this. It's just a shot, right? I got this!!"  My baby is a trooper!!

So as we sat down the woman looks at this record and reveals that I was-- not 1.. Not 2.. But 5 shots behind.  And the reality sunk in for her.  This. Was. Going. To. Be. UGLY.

He's a colossal 2 and she just turned 5 here..
Not easy to hold on to at the time.
Plus it is almost x-mas... So yeah....

Now, not only is SHE attempting to escape the building at the nearest exit-- But The E-man.  My ginormous bundle of joy.. (10lbs 7ozs at birth... I swear I birthed a 3 month old) sees a WHOLE lot of shiny shit. He is ready to be on the MOVE and everything WILL go directly into his ever drooling mouth.

So picture this... I am in a chair.  My right arm has a firm grip around Brianna's little body, where I can practically hear the needle scraping on bone because she is desperately trying to free herself from the terror that is steadily coming her way. My left hand is firmly attached to the boy's left ankle, because at this point, he is squirming around and belly flopping on the floor hoping the next move will free him and his mouth will be full of shiny, kill you dead, objects that are on the opposite side of the cafeteria.

It was a nightmare.. I was, literally, being pulled in 2 different directions-- and by this time-- all THREE of us were crying.  I looked desperately around the room at the hundreds of women staring at me in amusement. Sort of like, "Poor girl!  Glad it isn't me!"  I was at the point that if some random stranger came up to me and asked for my son-- I was going to give him to them and not look back.

And then it happened.  An angel stepped out of all these people staring at the 3 ring circus I had going on and offered to take my son.  She said, "Please... let me help you!  Let me hold your son for you!" -- By this point, I wasn't just crying-- I was bawling.  Brianna and I both-- like big ol' titty babies and I wasn't sure if we could survive the entire ordeal.

This woman saved our lives!  I don't know that we would have made it through the day.  I would have eventually had to release him and just hope that one of the surrounding nurses stopped him from drinking all the cocktails that they call immunizations.  The boy did down a bottle of scented bubbles shortly after at Brianna's 5th birthday party and promptly hurled all over the bouncy house as little girls came screaming out, so it would have been possible! And believe me-- we never purchased scented bubbles again...

But without this woman who stepped out from all the rest to assist me from going completely mad, I might have lost my shit.. well more then I already had.  I would have wondered where I was going to muster up the strength to go on doing every day things like this.  Doctor visits, meetings with teachers, going to the movies, the park, the store-- all of it had become a struggle. Sometimes just being home alone with them was more of a struggle than I would have ever admitted at the time because I absolutely preferred to struggle in silence.

We drive each other crazy sometimes

There really is little time that this woman's kindness is far from mind.  When I see a struggling parent, I do my best to help in any way I can-- Even if it's just making them laugh and reminding them that they are not alone.  When I see these kids screaming down the aisle and a parent who is about to unravel, I have been known to put my hand on their shoulder and tell them--- "Don't worry.... I lived through the insanity too...."

But we enjoy the crazies now :)

My Pants Have Wings: Living Life On A Moment's Notice... With No Regrets

I have come to realize recently that I have started to become known for a slight, "Fly by the seat of my pants" attitude in life. Typically, if I don't care for something or I decide I really want something else, I don't have much of an issue changing it real quick.  Jobs, relationships, business plans, habits, health.  Imagine it, I've probably switched it up a time or two without thinking twice.  When I decide something is done and over-- I am out the door and on to, what I hope will become, bigger and better things.  At that point, it is no question to me as to what I have to do to move on and become the happy person I am and want to continue to be.

Will it be tough? Hell yes it can be! Will I wish I was somewhere else then I was right then?? Quite possibly.. Will it always work out?  Uhh.. Absolutely not.. Sometimes one quick decision will need to lead to another.  BUT will I say-- "I wish I would have done something different?" Hell no!! I will say-- this is what I did and my current decisions are now what is important.  Time to find a way to make it work or move it along! 

Does that mean that sometimes I make rash decisions that I have to apologize for?  Oh my jeeze YES!!!  But I also have tact.. usually... well-- I have my moments.  I'm human, alright! I really do my best to make these decisions with class and not to burn bridges.. but no matter how much I work to make it an easy switch some people don't care for my decisions.  For the most part though,  I work everyday on being a better person.  That means leaving my past decisions in the past and only working to make sure I am so happy that it seeps out of my pores and into the people around me... Almost like an extremely contagious happy disease.


Now-- some see this as a downfall.  I don't get a chance to test the waters before I jump into things.  They may even see this as one of my biggest flaws in life.  "Well, that girl, she doesn't have a clue."  I have what is important.  I take what I need and ditch the rest. I just see no reason in wasting time when things aren't working out.

You see-- I realized something about me.  That I was not one of those people who felt as though they have to think long and hard to make the right decisions.  I believe that I have spent less time dwelling incessantly or worrying about the potential/current outcome of my good decisions then I even spent over my bad decisions.  I never once sat and said, "Oh man!!  They treated me so terribly at that job and I can do way better then this... I should have stayed and smiled through my pay cut."  or ever even dreamed of saying... "You know-- that guy was really bad to me.  he didn't respect me, my decisions or my family.  I wish we could have babies together and live in perfect misery for the rest of our lives."  It sounds funny saying it that way... But I know far too many people who think this way without even realizing that's what they're doing.

I have a family that loves me.  I have children who are brilliant..  I have the most amazing friends that a person could ever ask for.  There is food in my belly.. Shoes on my feet (when necessary).. Clothes on my back.  If I need something--- someone will ALWAYS be there for me or I will be strong enough to figure it out on my on.  I have no doubt that I may feel alone from time to time but I know that I am never truly alone.  People love me too much to allow that, just as I would for them.

Now, I'm not saying this kind of mindset is for everyone.  You may need to feel as though you are calculated and well thought out in your ways.. And really, to a huge extent, I do too.  Becoming a fly by the seat of my pants-er did NOT happen over night.  I would spend weeks, months or even years thinking on how I wished I could have something instead of making the decision and going for it..... But now I think, "Why waste time.  If you want it.  GO AND GET IT!" 

This is my first bikini in 19 years and somehow I feel better
in it at 36 then I did at 17. And it only took me 3 seconds
to decide to post this! Nice quick decision with no regrets!

A Drop of Magic a Day Will Make The Warts Go Away!

What my son's wart looked like in
December...pre-treatment

Warts--- no one wants them yet most of us have had them. Even seeing the word in bold makes me cringe a little. When I was younger, I had them all down my leg because I refused to believe that shaving would spread them... I also had a giant patch on my left hand.  

The ones on my leg, we used acid pads to treat and thankfully, due to a late and BAD case of the chicken pox, the virus was so strong it counteracted and killed the warts that covered my hand--- all but one.  And that one was a DOOZIE.  It was in the center of my hand, deep and planted in there.

I went to the dermatologist for about 12 to 15 weeks in a row getting it frozen 7x's in that time.  It was so painful that as a teenager who was pretty headstrong, I cried each time I got the, "Yeah... we're going to have to freeze it again" look.  It was a terrible experience that I'd never wish on anyone.

So, now my son has one.  It seemed to come out of nowhere and grow to the size of a Buick in a matter of weeks. We used Compound W, the doctor froze it 3x's, and even looked into some voodoo mind trick to make it go away... None of this worked. It would actually get BIGGER after each freezing. 

The "Cure All" in a bottle

Now his wart was not only getting bigger, the nature of a 7 year old was to pick at it so it looked like it was getting infected.  I felt as though the time was coming to get him to a dermatologist and start the entire freezing process.... and quite frankly... I procrastinated like a mo-fo because I didn't want him to have to endure what I did. But the embarrassment of what he had going on was worth the pain I explained would come with it to him.

Someone mentioned--and by the way-- that "someone" was my mom.  Just know that she will disown me if I don't give her credit-- but anyways, "someone" mentioned using Tea Tree Oil and I thought it was at least worth a shot.  We were to the point of going to a dermatologist and start a freezing process that will take weeks and cause lots of pain...  

I'm sure some of you already know the benefits of Tea Tree Oil, but I have recently found out, first hand, how amazing this stuff is! So, we had a whole little process going on and no lie.....  His wart went from the point of naming it and accepting Little Wartie as part of the family to non-existent in a matter of weeks. 

Here is what we tried and WORKED!!!!

2/14/13

1. We only treat it at night.  Each night, he gets in the bath, soaks it and cleans it right along with the rest of his funky 7 year old body-- this helps to soften it up and allow the oil to really soak in.
2. Before he even had time to get his skivvies on, we would douse it in hydrogen peroxide.  Even though it was "clean" his grungy little fingers were all up IN that thing making it red, swollen and a bit infected.
3. We doused the hell out of it with Tea Tree Oil.  Now, you have to be a bit careful with this because you do want the band aid to stick.  I was putting it directly on the band aid pad sometimes but he said it got too slippery and the band aid would not stay on.  Truth is-- I had some cheap-ass band aids and once we got some better ones, that puppy was NOT coming off.
4. Then------ we let it sit. 
5. At bath time, band aid off and process repeated for one more day.
6. Take the next day off
7. Watched the POS disappear before our EYES in a matter of two months.

2/27/13 almost completely gone!

I can't believe how easy it has been and I felt you MUST know! The poor kid has been super embarrassed about the thing even being there and can see that he is much happier since it has gone---although he won't be able to use it as a gross out/torture device for his sister anymore.. "I'm gonna put my wart on you if you don't stop it!!!"  Kids..... Can't get them to be comfortable with their warts yet can't get them to stop rubbing it all over their siblings as their own form of gross, but somehow fun, defense.





Anyways.. Peeps-- this is a cheap, painless way to rid yourself of quite a few things.. Here is a list of just a few other things that it can be used for besides warts...

• Athlete's foot
• Fungus infections of the nail
• Mild to moderate acne (I needed this in high school!!)
• Cold sores
• Yeast infections in the mouth and throat (also known as thrush and not to be swallowed)
• Bacterial Vaginal Infections
• Ear Infections
• Lice (No more expensive treatments)
• Scabies
• Ringworm
• Infection prevention in cuts, abrasions, burns, insect bites, stings and boils
• Bad Breath (although not to be swallowed and mixed with baking soda)
• Body Odor (May carry this around for a few peeps that offend noses often)
• Colds
• Dandruff
• Dry Skin
• Fleas (bites and kicking those things to the curb!)
• Hair Care
• Humidifier
• Removing Leeches (dear God don't let me ever have to use it for this!!)
• Mustiness and Mold
• Poison Ivy
• Sunburns
• A "head in tact" tick removal

I'm sure there is more than that and I would ALWAYS research it before you use it for any of the above reasons.... But man.....Save yourself some money, time and pain and check out Tea Tree Oil first! 

My happy, wart-free, camper!

GO NATURAL REMEDIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mama's Single and Ready-- Well Preparing-- To Mingle!

Dating-- What does that even mean after kids?  As a single mom I always wonder -- how do you really "date" a guy?  There are so many things you have to bring into the equation that it can get a little scary as to why you would even attempt such a thing.

Being a single mom-- eventually you get to where you feel like Carol Burnett in Annie as she's dancing around singing, "Little shoes, little feet, everything around me is... little." ...Minus the tub of vodka-- although I'm working on that one.  You walk around with house shoes and hair wraps bossing around your minions and hoping you wake up without a doll arm sticking you in the ass the next day.  

But, none the less--I've been divorced for almost 7 years, have had one "serious" boyfriend for about 6 months about 5 years ago and I've made the decision that it is time to start dating and open my mind to the possibilities before I shrivel up and I realize my singles search starts to  include the local rest home.  I just turned 36... Not that I feel like I've got one foot in the grave at all but it may be time to start giving it a little looksy...

So, how do I do this?  How do I start looking for someone who will fit into my equation?  How will I know if he is right for me and my kiddos??

Well, first off, I think of this as car shopping.. You do NOT have to buy the first one you see.  Get out there, shop around and learn what is important to you in a partner as you date all the wrong ones.. Those are the ones who REALLY teach you want it is you want as you discover exactly what it is you don't want..

Of course, dating after you have children is a whole new bowl of fruit loops.  When I used to think that I needed a low cut shirt and a short skirt to attract a man, now I'd rather have him attracted to my intellect (what little there seems to be these days after the kids suck the life out of me daily) and my charm (which is, well.... super charming if you ask moi but needs to grow on some of you)  

Also......Little Disclaimer here--- I know it is obvious I have put out in the past-- I have 2 kids.. Of course I've "done tha deed"... But that does NOT mean I put out for everyone I'm on a date with... I do have some sense of morals although some would beg to differ.